So I went to the ENT surgeon yesterday. Good times. Seriously, I have never been more entertained by any other dr's waiting room before. First of all, it seemed to me like everyone was SCREAMING at each other. They were all talking SO loud and I was wondering for a second why that might be . . . . until I realized they were all there to see the ear doctor. . . . I'm not the quickest (and apparently not quite as deaf as some). Because they were all yelling things that people would normally whisper, I learned WAY too much about them. We bonded. Without them even realizing it. I now know them better than some of my cousins.
There was one older couple and the man was filling out the patient intake form. Well, apparently the old man forgot every single sickness he's ever experienced in his life. He kept asking (very loudly):
"MILLY, HAVE I HAD PNEUMONIA?!"
and she would always reply,
"MILLY, HAVE I HAD VD?!"
Then there was a younger couple with a 3 year old son. How did I know he was 3? Why, because they announced it to the waiting room. The little boy was playing and everything he said was just so incredibly adorable that the mother found it necessary to repeat what he said (by yelling) and then adding inappropriate commentary. And, for some odd reason the young couple were sitting like 15 feet away from each other. There were enough chairs, but I guess the husband was tired of being yelled at from 6 inches away. The 3 year old kept telling everyone that it was his birthday. So the wife would look at her husband and go,
" IT'S MY BIRFDAY! HOW CUUUTE. WHAT TIME IS IT?? 2:05??!! OK, SO 3 YEARS AGO THIS TIME I WAS AT WHAT? 3 CENTIMETERS? OR WAS HE CROWNING? I THINK HE WAS CROWNING."
and then the little boy would say it was his birthday again and the woman would scream,
"THAT'S RIGHT! IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY! 3 YEARS AGO YOU WERE CLIMBING OUT OF MOMMY'S STOMACH!"
and then the little boy's eyes just widened and you could see the confusion on his face. I started to feel bad for the little boy because how hard would it be if your mom yelled at you even when she was happy? How confusing would that be? Oh, geez.
Anyway, so my doctor was . . . interesting. He actually had on one of those head mirror thingy's (see pic above) that normally only doctor's in like 1820 would wear. It looked like a costume. I didn't know if I should give him candy or ask for a prescription. Anyway, I get to have surgery. Woohoo.
***Sidenote - ok, so I had to find a pic of a doctor with a head mirror so you'd know what I was talking about and I found the one above. But .. . . .isn't that picture completely random? Why is Dopey going to the dr? And who amputated some lady's legs and then hung them on the wall? SO.MANY.QUESTIONS.