So I got a new job

I know this comes as a shock after reading the post title, but I got a new job. I'm still working within American Express but now I'm in Global Business Travel. It's a promotion, and the coolest part is that I now work from home. It's incredibly surreal. I've been in the new job for about a month now and I still feel like my old boss will call me any day and ask me where I've been. It's very odd. For about the first week and a half on the new job I didn't have anything to do because I was waiting for all of my equipment so that I could work from home. I was at home, bored, and full of anticipation for the new position. So what did I do? Crafts, of course. I wanted decorations for my new home office walls, so I made the incredibly stupid idea to make them. I made this decoration out of toilet paper rolls. It's something that I saw on pinterest and I actually really like how it turned out:

Then I made this sign with a quote that I really love:

I decide how hard a craft is by how much crying is involved. So the first craft was easy. The sign, however was a little difficult. Not at first though. At first I was thrilled on how simple it was. But it didn't look right. I couldn't figure out what was wrong. This is what it looked like at first:

Notice anything off? Yeah. That kinda ruined my day. I literally had to slowly peel off the paint and reposition the letters. That was fun.
This is what my office area looks like with everything finally put together: (the thing on the right is a white board. I have an intense obsession with making lists.)

It's been an interesting couple of weeks. I've been trying to adjust to working from home which seems like a simple concept, but it's more difficult than I first thought. Here's what I've learned so far:

• I can save a lot of gas working from home
• I also save the 2.6 seconds I normally would spend picking out a work outfit. Now my work outfit is whatever I happen to wake up in, which is awkward when I'm 'working' at my 'office' and the apartment maintenance guy literally comes walking in. Unannounced. True story.
• Being at home all day long really makes you notice how much you need to clean your apartment. The daylight really makes the dust stand out. And when you're faced with an impossible project, cleaning a toilet doesn't seem so hard. In fact, it seems like a delightful diversion.
• It's fun being able to decide when I take breaks. But I've learned that I cannot turn on the tv during my breaks. Because I intend to take a 10 minute breather, and then suddenly I'm finishing a 10 hour Real Housewives marathon. It's a problem.
• Now that I get to decide when I work, I decided to work until the work is done. The problem with that is: I work until the work is done. I'm a little bit of a perfectionist when it comes to work, so I will obsess over a project until I've done every possible thing to improve it. So this has not helped my sleep situation.

All in all, I really like my new job. I like the change, the challenge, and I actually do like working from home.

That's the end of my story.

So I interrupt our regular programming for a very serious question

So . . . you know FBI has a 'Most Wanted' list? Well I was thinking this morning - and wouldn't that mean they have other lists? Like, in order to have a most wanted, you'd also have a least wanted. And that just opens up all kinds of list possibilities. Like, I bet they have a 'Mildly Annoying' list, and a 'If we were to accidentally kill you we wouldn't cry at your funeral' list, etc. And I really really want to be on the 'Mildly Annoying' list. And if I wanted to shoot for the stars and really go for my dreams then honestly I can see myself being completely fulfilled in life if I got to be the one making the lists. The possibilities! And of course, I'd have to have fun with it. I mean, don't you think the FBI folks could use a chuckle or two? I'm sure they would find it amusing if I swapped out one of the Most Wanted guys for my high school Spanish teacher. For just like a week or two. So much wasted potential. And revenge opportunities.

So I'm still alive.

Hello there. Nice to see you. So I kinda forgot about this whole blog thing. It's funny how that happens. And to be honest, I don't really have anything really inspiring or earth shattering to share, but just thought I'd drop in.

Nothing's really changed. I'm still getting into weird situations, not sleeping, and having random health issues. Lately I've been changing what I eat, just to keep it interesting. Last week I decided to try all different brands of yogurt because I'm trying to find the best one. So every morning for breakfast I had a different kind. I was worried though that by the end of the week I would forget which brand I liked or didn't like. So I started writing my 'review' for the yogurt down on whatever was closest. So on random pieces of paper at work I have things written down like: 'Cascade Fresh: sour and lumpy', 'Stonyfield: liquidy and chunky', 'Chobani: possibly grabbed sour cream on accident?', 'Athenos: expired? or just really funky?'. And because I'm apparently really not organized, I wrote each one on something completely different. One was on a meeting agenda, one was a on a presentation, one on my calendar, etc. It makes for some fun reading and explanation for my co-workers that are wondering who I'm calling liquidy and chunky. Doesn't that description just make you hungry? Yum.

So it's been awhile

I have been busy and have kinda stayed away from the whole blogging idea for the last couple weeks. I've been trying to think of anything noteworthy to update with and this is all I've got:

- Remember how I got a flat tire while my nephew was in the car? Well he has yet to quit reminding me that my car is busted and that "Chelsie, you really shouldn't busted your car." Well, then a couple of weeks ago he was over at my apartment when my sister and I were bringing in groceries. My sister accidentally dropped a thing of sodas on the ground where 2 promptly self destructed. I brought the rest into the apartment and set it on the counter. As soon as I did, several cans dropped to the kitchen floor and burst open. The soda sprayed EVERYWHERE . . . the walls, the microwave, the ceiling, etc. I was kinda staring in disbelief when Ridge, who was watching from a couple feet away looked amazed. He then said, "What happened Chelsie? Your house 'splode (explode)?" So now he tells me that my car is busted and my house 'splode. Just Grand.
- I saw a trainer/fitness chick/hater-of-all-that-is-pain-free a couple of days ago. She apparently though I was in training to become a line backer, because she had me doing up-downs and all kinds of crazy exercises. By the end of it I couldn't feel my legs, and now I wish I couldn't feel my legs. It hurts so bad that I can barely get out of a chair, let alone walk. I've procrastinated anything that requires movement including going to the bathroom and sneezing. I'm now walking so funny that I've contemplated finding a wheel chair for the next couple or months, or whenever my muscles recover - whichever comes first. Which is ironic because I'm supposed to be working out so I could walk more, not less. I've learned my lesson: Exercise is bad for my health.

Yeah, that's pretty much it. Pretty boring.

So I cannot say goodbye

I'm in a predicament. So, to try and explain you have to understand that I am about the opposite of a hoarder with most things. I do not like holding on to a bunch of stuff, and have, on several occasions, thrown perfectly good items away. I'm talking clothes, movies, cds, childhood items, etc. I know it can be seen as wasteful - but I just hate having so much CLUTTER everywhere. If I don't use it - it's gone.

With that said, I randomly get extremely attached to certain things. I'm sure you're thinking that this is totally normal. However, let me demonstrate how I'm once again NOT normal.

The year is 1995 and I am in fifth grade. The world became fascinated with the scrunchie. All the girls in my grade literally couldn't go a day without accessorizing with a scrunchie on the wrist. And it was never just one scrunchie . . . it was always several (apparently in case some fatal accident occurs that requires the assistance of multiple scrunchies to . . . hold someones hair back.) So being the cool, classy chick that I am (don't all laugh at once) I followed suit and wore more scrunichies on my arm than anyones hair called for.I came in from recess one day and realized that in the process of walking around the fields (because playing on the swings was SO beneath me) I had lost a scrunchie. I immediately became so devastated that I rushed to my teacher and tearfully explained that I lost my scrunchie at lunch and absolutely HAD to go outside to find it. She pointedly looked at the remaining perfectly good scrunchies wrapped around my wrist and told me that I couldn't, but that she was sure it would show up in Lost and Found the next day. It didn't. I was so traumatized over this, that YES, I obviously still remember it. Being that attached to a hair accessory isn't healthy.

Well, it's happening again. You might remember that my computer is dying. It's been dying for awhile now and I'm having a hard time accepting it. And there's no doubt that it's over for this computer. It's literally being held together with masking tape in some places (aren't you surprised that I didn't use hot glue?) (not that I didn't think about it. But the masking tape was closer. I think that's how all life decisions should be made . . . which way is faster?). This computer has played it's last song, it has surfed it's last web, it has . . . well, you get the idea. And I was recently able to buy a new computer. The new computer is amazing - it has everything that the old computer doesn't have (um, it's functioning) and more. And yet I do not want to get rid of the old computer. Certain siblings have even offered to take it off my hands to squeeze the last bit of power out of it. It's probably selfish of me, but I can't let it go. I have had this computer for 4 years and I've used it pretty much every single day. I'm pretty sure this computer is going to be sitting on my desk until I'm 72. Like I said, I'm in a predicament.

So have you ever gone into a room and forgot what you needed? Yeah, I did that. But instead of a room, I went to WalMart.

This last week I was supposed to have 4 days off of work. Instead, I decided to do overtime. Not because I missed the wonderful world of work, but because everything I own apparently had a secret pact to all break at the same time. My TV died (we've been over that), my computer is on it's last leg, my cell phone is randomly freezing and turning itself off, and my dresser literally rocks back and forth when touched. It's gotten so bad that I've decided that any clothes in the dresser are off limits - it's not worth risking it's collapse. So I worked 11 hours on Thursday and was exhausted when I got home. However, I had to rearrange my bedroom because my parents were getting me a new Queen sized bed on Saturday. Currently I have a twin sized bed (I KNOW!!) so, I have to move furniture around to make it all fit. And I decided to completely organize EVERYTHING in my room in the process. Because I apparently thought that I needed to reach new levels of exhaustion. After I completely finished I was getting ready for bed because I had to be at work the next day at 5 am. I was so ready for bed and then I realized that in the process of moving and organizing, I had completely lost my alarm clock. And the only back up alarm I have is my phone. You know, the phone that randomly freezes and dies. Super reliable. So I decided to tear everything apart looking for for the clock. Hours later, I gave up the search because it was close to 2am, and I had to be up at 4:30. But I still couldn't sleep because I was so sure I wouldn't be able to wake up. Even when I did kind of drift off, I would wake up in a panic, sure that I overslept. So Friday I was kind of in a fog of exhaustion. It wasn't pretty. But I was determined to get everything done. I finished work and remembered that the day before I had made a long list of things I needed at WalMart. I remembered that there were several things that I really needed for the weekend. So I got to WalMart, and had gotten into the store before I realized I couldn't remember even one thing I actually needed. I was walking around thinking that blankly staring down every aisle would help me remember something, anything. No luck. And in my sleep deprived state I was really upset thinking that I would leave empty handed. So I decided to grab the closest item and buy that so my trip wouldn't be in vain.

Which is why I left WalMart with a peach candle.

So this post is kinda a bummer . . . .

I haven't written in awhile because all I have to say are complaints and angry sarcastic rants. Nothing big has gone wrong, but lots of little super annoying things keep happening. Any one of them I could handle and laugh at. And some days I do just that - but then something else happens and I want to break something. Ok, so I'll try to put this in chronological order:
1. This is long - you may want to skip. . . . I decided to remake my wall thingy because I kinda hated it. It was super ugly and annoying. So, I thought I'd learned from the past and would use wood this time and it would be super easy. Yeah, right. I got the wood and paper for the project and would use mod podge to seal it together. So the mod podge thing wasn't getting the paper to stick to the wood, so naturally I decided to mix glue with the mod podge. Because my improvisations with crafts make me a winner. Nope, that just made the paper all lumpy and gross. My sister took the job over and showed me how to correctly mod podge, and when we needed something flat to smooth the paper out over the mod podge, I grabbed my driver's license. Naturally. So my driver's license is mod podged. Because I screwed up so many of the boards, we had to go and buy more scrapbook paper and redo them. Then they had to lay out in my tiny apartment on the couch, table, and basically every surface. The next day I realized that although I had bought wall hanging kits, I had only bought 6, because apparently I suck at math and didn't count the 9 boards that I actually had. I thought it was safe to stack the boards because they were spread out everywhere until I could get more hanging kits. That melded the boards together and ruined 2 of them. That I had to redo. Again. It eventually turned out ok - but I am so bitter over the effort it took. Grrr.
2. My TV broke right after I got DVR. I was able to get a smaller, but still functioning tv from my sister though, so I figured it'll work until I save to buy a new one.
3. My DVD player stopped working. We were able to figure out (after awhile) that it was just a bad cord. That could be replaced - so it wasn't a total loss.
4. I filled a prescription and then lost it within 24 hours. The entire thing. I tore apart my apartment and car looking for it to no avail. I then had to fight with the pharmacy to get it refilled. At the same time I got an ear infection and had the fun experience of dealing with the nurses at work that could not be more condescending and rude. They finally gave me prescriptions for my ear and the prescription costs ended up costing more money then I had a available, because my insurance is ridiculously horrible.
5. My DVR broke. The geniuses at Cox couldn't figure out what the problem was and sent a guy out to replace it. I told them I don't get off work until 5, so they would have to come after that. They said that was no problem and I promptly got a call at 4:15 from the Cox guy that he was outside my apartment. When I finally got there (after 5), he was not happy. He replaced the box, saying that would fix it. I lost all my saved shows, and had to reprogram all my recordings. Which is kinda time consuming, and annoying.
6. Not even 5 days after getting a new box, my DVR broke again. With the same problem. That happened last Saturday. This was also the day that my towel rack decided to fall off the wall and my refrigerator door handle broke off. Then, I also got infested with bugs. They're these little flying things that I found out (after much trial and error) can be killed with windex. So my entire place (including my face) ended up coated in windex while I tried to kill these suckers. There were a ton - I counted over 50 that I killed alone. I found that they were coming out of the drains, so I plugged all the drains which meant I couldn't wash dishes and freaked anytime I had to take a shower. I went to WalMart hoping to find something that kills unidentified bugs and all I could find were these fly papers. When I got home and took it out of the box it looked like a roll of film. I pulled on the ribbon attached to this roll of film and out came a 3 ft long roll of the most disgusting sticky stuff ever. That I got stuck to my face. Don't ask me how. The guy came out Monday to replace the cable box AGAIN. And he was completely rude. He just walked back into room and back to my closet. Without asking. And I really didn't think cable guys NEEDED to go into my bedroom (they never had before) so it was messy. So embarrassing. And what he needed wasn't even in the closet, and I could have told him that, but he didn't ask. So I lost all my shows again, and had to setup all my recordings, AGAIN.
7. Then, yesterday after work I tried to see if the tv was working. And it wasn't. It was freezing every couple minutes so that you can only catch pieces of conversations. I called Cox, spending close to an hour on the phone, and the guy said he needed to reset my box. I asked if this would erase all my shows and make me re-setup all my recordings. He assured me that it wouldn't, and then got off the phone. When my box restarted, it not only erased everything again, but it didn't fix the problem, so I had to call back AGAIN. And they have no solution except replacing it. Again. It's like a really bad version of Groundhog's Day with this stinking company.
8. Work. I've been careful not to discuss work online because it's dangerous, but I will just say that holy cow, it is adding to the list. In a big way.

This isn't even everything, but it's all happened in the last 3ish weeks. And I'm ready for things to be boring. Honestly.

*END OF ANGRY BITTER RANT*